8 March 2011
Three reasons to call it a day
How do you know if you’re going through a rough patch, or if could be time to end a relationship? The decision has to be decided by you, but here are three reasons why your relationship could be on the train to nowhere.
While there isn’t an official list of reasons why couples break up, a recent study found that the same three issues continue to pop up. In the study 150 couples* were asked why their relationship ended, and topping the list was the desire for more independence. In fact, 27 per cent of men and 44 per cent of women claimed they felt trapped in their last relationship.
Second on the list was a lack of similarity and common interests. The study participants stated that their views on everything from moral beliefs to hobbies were “too different” from their partners as time went by. The more in touch we feel with our partner, the more willing we are to invest in a relationship with them.
The third most common reason for breaking up is a lack of supportiveness. One female participant said, “He never listens to what I have to say…he’s inconsiderate about my feelings…he cares more about football than he does about me.” As this comment shows, if we don’t feel supported by our partners, the relationship has no strong foundation to stand on.
Making the break
Realising why you might break up with someone is the easy part, but actually ending the relationship can be hard, hence making it tempting to put it off. If you decide to end your relationship, do so sooner rather than later. At least then you have a good chance at staying friends or being able to look back on the good times that you shared together.
*Centre for Relationship Development at Seattle Pacific University.