1 February 2011
Posting Guidelines for eHarmony Advice
Please read our Posting Guidelines for commenting on eHarmony Advice - they might save you some time.
eHarmony Advice provides the opportunity for discussing the subjects of dating, relationships, and the use of the eHarmony service. Our goals are to provide an environment which is inclusive and safe and to make this a place where you can find support and lively, entertaining, and intelligent discussions.
There are 10 guidelines which we expect all participants in eHarmony Advice to follow:
1.) We welcome debate and dissent, but the key to maintaining eHarmony Advice as an inviting space is to stick to the discussion of issues. We prohibit personal attacks and abuse of other users. Similarly, we don’t allow posts that contain derogatory comments about people who work for eHarmony. While we welcome criticism of the articles we publish, for the sake of robust discussion, we will distinguish between constructive, focused criticism of these articles and personal attacks or misrepresentations of eHarmony editors and writers.
2.) Please respect other people’s views and beliefs and consider their impact when making your contribution. We understand that people often feel very strongly about issues debated on the site, but we will consider removing any content that others might find extremely offensive or threatening. We reserve the right to redirect or curtail conversations which descend into flame-wars based on ingrained partisanship or generalisations. We don’t want to prevent people from discussing topics they are enthusiastic about, but we do ask that you find a way of sharing your views that does not feel divisive, threatening, or offensive to other users.
3.) We will not tolerate hate-speech in any form or content that could be interpreted as such. Derogatory comments related to gender, race, colour, age, religious views, national origin, sexual orientation, physical characteristics, or disability will be removed. In addition comments that may cause distress, embarrassment, or humiliation will not be tolerated. We recognise the difference between criticising a particular government, organisation, community or belief and attacking people on the basis of their race, religion, gender, sexual orientation or other characteristic.
4.) We may remove any posts that we determine:
- contain language that is inappropriate or offensive (including any modifications of such words in an attempt to bypass our foul language filter)
- are hateful, bigoted, defamatory, abusive, or threatening
- are sexually explicit, vulgar, or obscene
- encourage illegal activities
- are obviously commercial endeavors or otherwise spam-like, including solicitations for research studies or media interviews
- include links that have been posted for commercial benefit
- distribute software
- are not written in English
- we deem are otherwise in violation of the Posting Guidelines
5.) We will remove any content that may put us in legal jeopardy, such as potentially libellous or defamatory postings, or material posted in potential breach of copyright. We don’t allow posts that contain material you do not own. Before posting any information which is not your own original work of authorship, you must obtain the consent of the copyright owner. If such an event occurs, the individual posting the information will be held solely responsible.
We understand that you may wish to quote from external sources, but please try and refrain from copying and pasting extensively, which not only slows down the discussion, but potentially leads to copyright problems. It’s definitely better to post a short quote or synopsis and a link to the original article.
6.) Think before you press the “Submit Comment” button. Remember that this is a public forum, and your words will be archived on this site and available for anyone to find for a long time – the web has a very long memory. Think carefully before including personally identifiable information about yourself of others (such as details about exactly where you work or live, email address, phone number, etc.). Any such information posted may be removed.
7.) Keep it relevant. If you post something which is unrelated to the original topic, your post may be removed in order to keep the thread on track. The same applies to questions about moderation practices – these should not be posted on the site and are subject to removal. Additionally, do not make duplicate comments within a thread or post the same comments across several articles. Duplicate postings are frustrating for all users, and we encourage you to report any duplicate posts you may see.
8.) The platform is ours, but the conversation belongs to everybody. We want this to be a welcoming space for intelligent discussion, and we expect participants to help us achieve this by notifying us of potential problems and helping each other keep conversations inviting and intelligent. If you see a post which is clearly in violation of the Posting Guidelines, you may notify us by emailing firstname.lastname@example.org. That is the only acceptable means of reporting problem posts: discussions about ‘trolls’ are not acceptable and may be removed.
9.) Remember that text isn’t always a great medium for conversation: tone of voice – sarcasm, humour, etc. does not always come across when using words on a screen. Be aware that you may be misunderstood, so try to be very clear about what you are saying, and expect that people may understand your contribution differently than you intended. To keep our community open and inviting to all viewpoints, please maintain a reasonable tone, even in unreasonable circumstances! Also, don’t type in all CAPS, as your readers may consider this shouting. Divide your posts into paragraphs for easy reading, and go easy on the Internet abbreviations, (ROTFL, OMG) as this may limit your effectiveness communicating with some readers.
10.) Users who seriously, persistently or willfully ignore the Posting Guidelines or eHarmony Terms of Service will have their posting privileges on eHarmony Advice revoked. This is not an action that we take lightly or arbitrarily. However, our mission is to create and maintain a positive online experience for our users, and we reserve the right to make decisions which we feel support that. Prior to any banning, when possible the participant will be warned and given a chance to modify their approach; however, depending on the circumstances and the severity of the offense, we reserve the right to ban a user without prior notification.
In short, if you act with maturity and consideration for other users, you should have no problems:
- Show and share the intelligence, wisdom and humour we know you possess. Don’t be unpleasant.
- Take some responsibility for the quality of the community in which you’re participating. Help make it better, and it will be.
Republishing Your Words
One of the best ways to encourage more participation in these discussion boards is by sharing your very best quotes with a wider audience. Therefore we may take various quotes from our boards and use them in emails, advertising, and promotional efforts. If we do so, we’ll only use your screen name and we promise to use great care in the quotes we choose. We will never use a quote from you that is embarrassing, endangering or inflammatory.