6 January 2011
Five tips to enhance your eHarmony experience
eHarmony is a completely different online dating experience, and it pays to know exactly how to get the most from our service. Read on for five tips that will aid you on the path to love.
1. Be realistic, yet positive
At eHarmony we’re not into outlandish, unfounded promises. We’ll never guarantee you’ll find love – but we can tell you that thousands of couples have met and married through our service over the years. And we can also tell you that every single couple you see in our adverts is real. Some of those couples may have been on lots of dates before finding the right match, and some may have met straight away.
The point is, you have a great chance of meeting someone you really click with on eHarmony. But you need to be open and ready to put yourself out there – and put in some effort too. We’ll present you with your compatible matches, and it’s up to you to do the rest. Ultimately, you should find it an incredibly rewarding experience.
2. Prepare to learn more about yourself
You go into eHarmony full of hope that you will find your match, and yet you’re faced with ignored communications and people you think you’d never like if you met them in person. You may wonder how on earth you were matched with these people, but instead of dismissing your matches, you can see what they say about you.
Think of your matches as a mirror of your personality – this mirror doesn’t always lie. If there seems to be a pattern emerging, perhaps – gasp – it could be down to you, not your matches? Maybe you come across as too eager, or to dismissive; the positive side is that you now have the opportunity to learn about yourself and alter your behaviour.
3. Embrace your ‘flaws’
Chemistry is a funny thing. While we match you with other people on compatibility, giving you the best chance at starting a relationship, there’s no accounting for chemistry. Never assume that because you think you’re too small, or too tall (or whatever other body measurement you may use to judge yourself) that your match will think the same. It could be those things that you think make you feel an outsider that your match will absolutely love about you.
4. Know what your deal breakers are – and what you can compromise on
We all think we know our type and the kind of people we ‘just won’t fancy’. But look back on your previous relationships – we bet there are some in there that started completely out the blue. Love comes from the most unexpected sources, so rather than thinking ‘Oh, he’s a bit short for me’, start communicating, you never know where it might lead.
On the other hand, don’t break your ‘Must Haves, Can’t Stands’ because you really want something to work. If you know you could never marry a smoker, then don’t start going out with them. You probably won’t be able to make them quit, and then you’ll just be unhappy.
5. Give yourself the opportunity to learn
Of course, it’s easy for us to say, ‘Never deviate from your Mush Haves and Can’t Stands’. You’ll probably need to do that simply to test your boundaries – after all, we learn by doing…and making mistakes. But think about eHarmony as a fresh way to look at dating and relationships. As you go on, you’ll learn as much about yourself as you will about what you want from a relationship. And that can be an amazing experience.
If you’re prepared to make mistakes and be honest with yourself – and your matches – then you should gain a lot from your eHarmony membership.