Relationship Advice

26 May 2011

New Feature: see when your match last logged in!

by eHarmony

We want to let you all know about a great new enhancement we’ve made to eHarmony match profiles – something we’re calling ‘Active Within’.


We’ve been told by many of you that one really useful thing to know about a match would be their level of activity on the site, including when they last logged in to their profile. Having this information can help you prioritise who to communicate with now, and who to communicate with later.

You spoke, we listened! As of today, all eHarmony subscribers will notice, when looking at a match (right next to the match’s name), a stamp showing the approximate time frame when that match was last on the site. You will see last login times as one of the following:
Today
Yesterday
Within the last week
Within the last two weeks
Over three weeks ago

As you look at your new matches, you’ll quickly notice that they are in most cases as active as you. Hopefully that’ll give you or your match the confidence to take the next step and start communication. We’d love to hear what you think about this new feature in the comments below!

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Rating: 5.6/10 (24 votes cast)
New Feature: see when your match last logged in!, 5.6 out of 10 based on 24 ratings

Comments

1

AR

1 June 2011 02:22

Although I understand that this feature is useful, I find this bothersome. I do not appreciate being stalked or having matches know when I am online. This feature alone will mean that I will discontinue my membership.

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Rating: 4.7/5 (12 votes cast)

2

N

5 June 2011 04:09

This feature should be optional. People use this feature to stalk others and spy whether they are active on the site and use this to make ill formed judgments. This particularly complicates dating relationships as they start. It’s a terrible feature: there are no actual positive uses for it–only negative ones.

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Rating: 4.6/5 (15 votes cast)

3

eHarmony

8 June 2011 01:51

This new feature was a response to feedback from members to provide greater transparency around the activity level of their matches. Users are not notified when you come online, but many of our users have told us that knowing the activity level of a match can help them decide which matches are more likely to respond to communication. As this is a new feature we appreciate your feedback and please keep it coming!

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Rating: 3.4/5 (5 votes cast)

4

Roberto Jimenez Vela

11 June 2011 01:33

I am new to this website and think this new feature has its pros and cons. One advantage would be that you can see whether the matches you are getting are active, but at the same time another matches would think that you are a cheater dating with many matches at the same time,

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Rating: 4.8/5 (8 votes cast)

5

Z

13 June 2011 10:56

Awful feature. Intrusive. Needs to be removed. Greater transparency around the activity level of matches is not necessary, and the level of activity of a match is better assessed by their response or otherwise to your communication. Particularly unhelpful in the initial stages of a relationship. I also don’t want people knowing what days I log in.

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Rating: 4.6/5 (12 votes cast)

6

D

23 June 2011 00:54

Usually people say that they are not judgmental…I truly don’t care if the person is active every day and I would never judge anybody for doing so. This is an example of how close minded people can be and they put themselves in contradiction. Just take it easy!

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7

ingi

23 June 2011 02:00

Im not sure,
I guess it is what it is. Funny how transparency can make people uncomfortable. Makes you wonder what they are hiding. Good feature e harmony.

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8

liz

12 July 2011 11:33

An absolutely unnecessary feature. It is an invasion of privacy to have others know when you have been online. It sometimes takes time to feel ready to respond to a communication, and that should be respected. Trying to dress it up as a ‘Prioritise who to communicate with’ feature is dishonest.

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9

person B

24 July 2011 21:59

Pros and cons: good for stalking someone…bad for someone stalking you. Sometimes I go on-line for a quite check, and don’t have time to respond to a match. If they see I was on line and did not respond to them, they may think I am not interested. So, I am not entirely sold on this option.

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10

Jimmy

31 July 2011 07:35

I think this, combined with the removal of the ‘anonymous viewer’ feature, adds more to the overall experience on eH than it subtracts.

I would like to think that most people who sign up to eH, including all the commentators above, have gone through the detailed questionnaire process and paid a premium for the subscription service, because they are mature adults who are looking to find and start a genuine relationship.

The transparency that these features provide allows users to clearly see whether their matches are indifferent to them, and move on to focus on other matches after a suitable period.

If you don’t want any communication with a match, then send them a clear message by closing them off, period.

If you don’t close them off and they’re interested, then they may think there’s always a chance, and I think it’s unfair to their feelings if they don’t get any indication whether you’re active and whether you’ve even had a chance to consider their profile yet.

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11

Daisy

20 August 2011 13:03

Truly idiotic…..others have cancelled membership b/c of it.I will follow suit. Features recently instituted take away from some of the mystery which can make things more interesting and fun. I used to love this site; not anymore.. Site is going downhill fast. And it IS intrusive.This site is doing some sneaky things.Sayonara!

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Rating: 4.0/5 (4 votes cast)

12

Janet

25 August 2011 00:41

I am confused about what “get to know each other means”? Does that mean that someone wants to initiate communication or that eHarmony is advising that this is a match?

As to showing when a viewer has been active, I suggest that it is neither here nor there. Since this website is like shopping, why feel self conscious or regard the date of viewing as judgemental?

regards

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13

LightningStrikes

5 September 2011 07:20

Based on my short experience on here this is a useful feature. When you don’t get a reply back, postive or negative, you need something else to indicate whether you should look elsewhere. People who go online and do not reply to contact from other people are being stunningly immature, especially give that this is a closed system. You can shut off contact with someone pretty easily if you need to, so describing it as stalking is peculiar.

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Rating: 3.0/5 (2 votes cast)

14

Bev Mulrain

18 October 2011 10:04

I am not sure about this feature..as I am new to this and prefer that I can log on and off without others knowing and something I don’t always want to share this information. Not that I have anything to hide sometimes I just am curious and want to clarify something that I feel is important and I prefer to privacy to do this.

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15

phillip

22 October 2011 11:48

i really wish the matches would respond to set asked questions, or to let you know if they are still interested in knowing you ( how long do you have to wait to get any response )it’s very annoying when you check the site every day.

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16

B

23 October 2011 21:01

What about if you log in to the mobile app?

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17

joan

28 November 2011 08:47

I must admit, i agree, dont have this ,option of knowing when people log in. Does it really matter? All i ask is that people be courteous and do the right thing and reply to icebreakers or email. Is that too hard to ask?

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18

Neil Shaw

12 December 2011 17:14

Dear eHarmony,
I believe that a ‘last login’ feature such as this will create a huge transparency in the honesty and loyalty of members.If I was trying to communicate with someone I had an interest in, and found them logging on, and not on my profile, or my page, I would tend to think they’re hunting for something more. I’d be a little suspicious.

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19

I like it

31 December 2011 10:47

I like it. If I am waiting to see if someone is interested & he has loged on recently & not contacted me I realize he is not interested & can close the match. Particulary helpfull for long distance matches.

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20

new guy

3 January 2012 23:29

i just want to know ,,if i really like a match and am on a computer a lot during the day,,, and log on daily to see if there was a response,,, would that person think i am too forward by being logged in every day? hope not,,, im just quite chatty and love to write my funny stories and its a real clean-minded hobby of mine to chat a lot on line,,

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21

AT

14 January 2012 19:32

This is actually a the right amount of information. Other sites give you too much information. e.g you logged in at 12:41 etc. This just says you logged in today. It’s a difficult balancing act but I think you have hit the right note on this. This gives the person sending msgs enough info to know it’s not worth sending msgs or to realize the other person isn’t interested.

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22

S

19 April 2012 07:32

I do not like this feature or the feature that shows when someone has looked at your profile. It has overtones of stalking. If someone wants to contact you they will via the many direct ways that are available.A better and more upfront feature would be one that tells you if the match is no longer a paid member!

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Rating: 5.0/5 (2 votes cast)

23

Dave

27 August 2012 14:07

This is an invasion of my privacy. If I want to know if someone is active or whether or not someone has viewed my profile eHarmony has a wonderful feature on the home page titled, “Who Viewed My Profile”. In today’s very privacy sensitive environment I’m very surprised that eHarmony has refused to remove this feature or at least provide the user with an easy way to shut it off. What’s it going to take for eHarmony to respect our privacy? Maybe when the likes of Michael John Anderson, Philip Markoff, John Katehis or the Long Island Rapist, all of Craigslist fame, begin stalking eHarmony’s customers then eHarmony will fix this.

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24

Tim

7 September 2012 03:18

I think this option sucks. If I want to just log in to read profiles I do not always want someone I am communicating with to know I logged in and did not answer their questions at this time. We should have the option to turn off.

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25

Brisbane girl

24 November 2012 07:54

This option is fine. I don’t feel it’s an invasion of privacy at all, that’s a bit extreme. Someone told me they didn’t come on here much as an explanation for not responding to me after they had initiated the communication. I had accidentally spotted the “active today” under their name and knew otherwise. Maybe they were trying to spare my feelings or decided they weren’t interested after all. Whatever it was is fine. I had no problem if they were talking/looking for other people, we weren’t committed just ‘meeting’. I know now to close their match and move on.

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26

Mike D

14 January 2013 13:10

Pros:
.”Today” and “Within a week” are not too descriptive as to expose an overly enthusiastic user (eg. 12:31pm, then 1:04pm, then 4:15pm)
.Great indicator of a user’s activity level.
.No more wasted time messaging inactive members.
.Effective tool to assess the time and effort another user is putting towards your particular communications.
.May be indicative of the “competition” faced in gaining their attention. (You better have an amazing profile and picture, to even attract a popular user’s attention).
.The transparency to make an informed decision to move on from an apparently disinterested match.
.Knowing when to close overly-active/desperate/clingy matches.
.An astute user can even determine when another user often checks in, or even if they’re currently online. (I.e changes from “active yesterday” to “active today.”)
.A particularly impatient, rude, hateful, or narrow-minded match may oust themself as such. (Makes your decision to close them easier).

Cons:
.Everyone can see that you log in at least daily.
.Everyone knows that you are hardly ever on.
.You, or your matches may mistakenly misinterpret your activity, or your responsiveness (eg. as being rude, disinterested, or already in a relationship.)
.Matches know if you’re ignoring them.
.Matches know you were not being 100% honest when you said you’re “hardly ever on.”
.No more stringing people along in the dark.
.Your privacy may feel invaded.
.You may be harassed or abused for “ignoring” a match.
.You may be “stalked.”

.. The list goes on.

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27

Georgie z

21 February 2013 13:29

This feature isn’t requested so that you can decide who will respond to you. It’s so people who you decide to date can see if you continue to be active after meeting them. It actually in my experience causes issues in potential partners. Examples…. ” If you like me why are you still viewing other people?”. ” I saw you were online still and you havent viewed my profile who are you talking to?”. ” You didnt text me today but you had time to go online” No one should be able to see what i am doing without me giving permision It feels like big brother is watching! It should be optional. It is a great tool for stackers!

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28

DeeDee

5 April 2013 20:01

This is ok, sometimes you do not know if a member is active – you can log on without reviewing a profile again – you can close someone out ASAP for whatever reason and then still re-open – it’s frustrating being on any of these sites, but “it is what it is”.

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29

SM

12 May 2013 09:40

Although I understand that some people may not be comfortable with this feature, I find it useful in determining whether this site is a scam. I can’t quite understand how I get my daily matches and when I log on some of the matches have not been active for over a month. Why then am I being matched with them at this time?? It just doesn’t make sense to me.

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30

Mili

27 June 2013 23:34

I have been wondering about the exact same thing,SM…

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31

Amy

12 October 2013 01:18

This feature proved to be extremely valuable to me recently. I met someone on EH and at HIS request, we got to know each other, dated, and eventually became exclusive. We dated for 5 months, during which time neither of us removed our profiles (I honestly just forgot about it and didn’t log on again after we were dating… so I would have been one of those “inactive” people). However, when I recently started noticing some other suspicious behaviors in my boyfriend (i.e., him receiving text messages at 1:00 am from another woman), my friend suggested that I log in to EH and check to see when he was “last active.” This hadn’t even crossed my mind but wouldn’t you know, he was active LAST WEEK. Now, mind you, we have been “exclusively” dating for 5 months and he was active LAST WEEK? Why the need for being active on EH if you’re in an exclusive relationship? When I confronted him about this, of course he told me that he was NOT on the site, that his email must have logged him in and shown him “active” as he checked his incoming messages (like when you receive daily emails for new matches, etc.) Come on. I’m not that stupid. Even if you have the mobile app, you STILL have to click on the hyperlink inside the email to check the match or EH mail or whatever and THEN it will take you into the EH site and show you active. Otherwise, you won’t be classified as “active.” So this feature absolutely helped me realize that who I was dating was not who I thought he was (or who he portrayed himself to be).
If you have nothing to hide, this feature shouldn’t be a threat or issue at all. Transparency and honesty are ALWAYS the best policies and if you DO have a problem with people knowing your activity on this site, perhaps on-line dating isn’t for you. In my opinion, this “active” status is necessary for a virtual dating experience… It provides the truth of knowing whether or not the person you decide to be exclusive with is trolling for other women or at least window shopping to keep options open. (And… if you AREN’T dating someone exclusively and it shows you were active BUT you didn’t communicate with one of your matches, that IS a subtle hint that you aren’t interested). When you’re exclusive with someone, transparency should be something you WANT rather than something you’re offended by.
So in my case, it proved to be extremely helpful.

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32

Anthea

20 February 2014 11:49

Just keep in mind before you chop someone off that they may just do a quick log on and not have time to do a reply to a smile that particular day. There may then be a personal problem that keeps them logging in for a day or two. Meanwhile you’ve given up on them and hidden their match. You may potentially have killed any chances of meeting who may have become the love of your life! I’d myself wait at least a week before hiding. Yes a long shot maybe but you just never know!

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33

Steve

11 March 2014 15:32

I beg to differ!

I recently went through the chore of clicking through each and every one of my current matches and a lot of them are ‘active over a month ago’. Hardly ‘as active as me’ – I check the site every day.

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34

M.L

1 July 2014 14:53

I think its a horrible feature, almost to the point where I may drop my membership. Its basically a stalking feature, it makes most women uncomfortable. Its weird how eharmony doesnt seem to take advice from all the discontented customers.

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