4 Tips for introvert- extrovert relationships

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They say opposites attract, and this can indeed be the case when an introvert and extrovert fall in love. Many people wonder how and even if these relationships can work, and we’re here to tell you that yes they can! While they don’t come without their challenges, successful introvert-extrovert relationships can be very rewarding in that these two personality types can learn a lot from one another and complement each other very well.

Here are some common challenges they could face and how to overcome them:

  1. They may feel that their partner doesn’t truly ‘get’ them

Because of their big personality differences, it can often be difficult for extroverts to understand introverts and vice versa. While the introvert will often need alone time to unwind and process things, the extrovert will likely want to deal with issues by talking through them together. The key is to communicate and respect each other’s individual needs and boundaries, and be prepared to compromise and meet each other half-way when necessary.

  1. The extrovert will likely want to go out more than the introvert

A common challenge these couples face is their differing needs and expectations when it comes to socialising. An introvert will probably be happy to stay at home most nights with a good book or movie, while the extrovert will crave human interaction. Again, it’s important for each person to express their individual needs while respecting the others’.

For example, it may be important to the extrovert for their partner to attend certain events, while other times they could happily compromise and go out with friends. Couples should be clear on expectations around social commitments to avoid misunderstandings and conflict.

  1. The introvert may feel that the extrovert speaks too much and listens too little

Often these couples naturally fall into the dynamic where the extrovert does the majority of the talking while the introvert listens quietly, helping their partner process thoughts and ideas. Not balancing this with equal self-expression though can be draining on the introvert, and is likely to leave them feeling neglected and as though their own feelings aren’t important. It’s necessary for the introvert to practice assertiveness and express these needs to their partner, and that they want to have their thoughts and opinions valued as much as them.

  1. The extrovert might try to help bring out their partner’s extroverted self, but this might be perceived as not accepting them for who they are

Extroverts will often take it upon themselves to ‘fix’ their partner, as if it is their duty to bring out their extroverted side and help improve their social skills. Of course, unless the introvert asks for their help, this is not helpful behaviour and is likely to be perceived as an attempt to change them and not accepting them for who they are. Again, it’s important for each person to accept and respect their partner’s different needs and unique personalities.

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