10 Simple Mistakes Men (and Women) Make in Online Dating


1. ‘How are you?’ is not a conversation starter. Try picking something you found interesting from my profile and asking me specifically about that. Unless this is free therapy. In that case, how much free time do you have?

2. Spelling counts. It just does. Try spell check. It will check your grammar, too.

3. Don’t message me again … and again … and again. Sometimes guys just don’t take the hint. If we’ve messaged and nothing came of it, then a few weeks or months later you write to me again and we exchange some notes but nothing comes of it – maybe don’t make that third attempt. We’re all busy. But nobody wants to be a back-burner date idea or your creepy obsession. Be like “Adele Dazeem” and Let It Go.

4. If you look sad in all your pics, I’m going to believe you’re sad. Chin up, buddy. It can’t be that bad. Look at Ronald McDonald! He’s lovin’ it.

5. Women don’t owe you a reply. Just because you message a woman, she does not owe you a reply. Be cool. (And this goes both ways, ladies!)

6. Please ask about me. Something even the cool guys who are sort of good at online dating don’t seem to understand; you have to also ask me about me. It’s not just about you and what you’re interested in and what you do and what you like. I am a person with an exciting life, too, thanks. If you don’t ask me about myself when we’re messaging, I will not meet up with you for a lifetime of the “YOU” show. Sorry I’m not sorry.

7. If there is a woman in your picture, you don’t look available. Guys, please stop using pictures of you and just one other woman. Oh, she’s your friend? Okay, sure, yeah, whatever. It’s weird.

8. First dates that last longer than a few hours are awkward. Maybe we could start by like having *a* drink or *a* coffee or going on *a* walk, rather than get together for a picnic, then a sunset cruise followed by picking our wedding venue? Something that lasts one to two hours, tops.

9. Seeing a movie is a bad first date idea. Why don’t we go somewhere where we can, I don’t know, TALK and get to know one another? Rather than sit quietly in the dark for two hours listening to each other breathe?

10. Don’t be gross. Enough said!

Got any more online dating mistakes to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below, or join the conversation @eHarmony_AU or on Facebook.com/eHarmonyaustralia.

This article originally appeared on eHarmony Blog.

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