What Aussie politics can teach us about dating
Australia has broken up with Tony. Malcolm is about to have his first date with Australia. But she has baggage.
Australia had a reasonably short but tumultuous relationship with Tony. She enjoyed ups and downs, fun times and disappointments, but ultimately she realised they were not compatible. When chatting with her girlfriends over a cocktail, Australia came to the realisation that she and Tony had different values, beliefs and expectations about the relationship. She realised that fundamentally, they were not on the same page with the big ticket items.
Yesterday’s #libspill showed us that, on a grand scale, when two parties are not aligned on the important things, relationships break-down. So how can we learn from this and apply the lessons to our dating lives?
You can avoid your own #relationshipspill by following these 3 steps:
1. Get clear on your own non-negotiables
In political circles, we may be talking about marriage equality or paid parental leave, but in your personal relationships what will you not compromise on? What are the top 3 things that matter most to you in life?
2. Vote with your feet
If you encounter a potential date who demonstrates one of your deal-breakers, walk away. Save yourself a #relationshipspill down the track by only investing in dates who share your values.
3. Be prepared to cross the floor
Be flexible on the superficial things and be open to considering alternatives. For example, if you have always dated tall brunettes, why not consider a short blonde?
Time will tell how well Malcolm and Australia get along. Let’s hope they can enter their new relationship with a fresh perspective, an openness to new ideas and a shared commitment to the things that matter.
By Melanie Schilling, Psychologist and Dating Coach
What are your non-negotiables when it comes to dating? Let us know in the comments below or join the conversation on Facebook, Twitter & Instagram. And if you are ready to narrow down the world of possibilities, sign up to eharmony today- find someone made for you.
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