What not to ask on a first date | Dating Advice | eHarmony Australia
The way you communicate on a first date is very important; it lets your date know about you and vice versa, and it shows you if that essential ‘spark’ is there. But there are some subjects that should steer clear of.
Want to get to date number two? Then don’t utter any of these…
When are you planning on walking down the aisle?
Light and airy should be the tone of a first date. Conversation surrounding similar interests, jobs and musical tastes is perfect – asking about your date’s life plans is not. Keep in mind that that you are pretty much strangers, and questions like ‘What kind of wedding do you want?’ could be classed as rude or straight up scary. If you really want to know if your date is looking for a long-term relationship, look at their lifestyle, career and living arrangements which should give you good clues as to where they are in their lives.
You’re how old?
Your date may have the odd grey hair or wrinkle (amount depending on the age range you’re dating in of course), but unless you genuinely think they’ve lied about their age, this is just plain rude. If you have the urge to ask, and you’re having a good time with your date, ask yourself, ‘Why does it matter?’
Do you have any kinky secrets?
However well you’re getting on, however much you think the sexual tension is crackling between you, refrain from asking about your date’s bedroom antics. Even said as a joke, you’re asking about someone’s most intimate desires, and they may not feel that comfortable with you. At best you’ll seem a bit crass, at worst you’ll sound perverted…
Can you lend me a few bucks?
As we mentioned above, your date is a virtual stranger, so borrowing money off them is an absolute no-no. Even if you have the best of intentions and hope to see them again, they don’t know that. And ultimately, it gives the impression you can’t look after yourself, which is not an attractive quality.
You’re the man/woman of my dreams!
We all go on dates with the hope that they might lead to something more, and if it’s an especially good date, you might even have a good feeling about the future. However, this is not the time to voice this thought. Hopefully, your date is having similar positive thoughts about you, but most people take longer than a few hours to process this information. Bite your tongue on this one.
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