Your dating profile: getting beyond the photo



It is sad but true – after all that time filling in the questionnaire and your About Me profile, thinking carefully about what to say and how to say it – when your details land in someone’s inbox as a potential match they could take one look at your profile photo and dismiss you immediately. It sounds harsh but it is how most people select matches – only reading the profiles of those that they find physically attractive. When matches are rejected on the basis of the photo alone the chances of success in finding a compatible partner is seriously limited for everyone.

A different approach

eharmony is different from other dating sites. Our unique Compatibility Matching System eliminates the need to trawl through page after page of profile photos. At eharmony, know there are certain key characteristics that made people compatible and therefore more likely to stay happily together. These things included their values, intellect, and sense of humour and it is these characteristics that the personality questionnaire is designed to elicit.

eharmony finds you matches based on these core characteristics, measured through our 32 dimensions of compatibility. Even though a photo may not be instantly appealing to you, it is only a photo and if you met the person face to face you may just find them attractive and could develop a good basis for a relationship. The selection process has worked successfully for thousands of couples and it is meant to do the hard work for you.

Create your profile


While it important that you find a partner physically attractive it is not possible to tell from a photograph whether you will or not. Physical attraction is made up of more than just what the eye can see. How someone smells, their mannerisms, their way of relating to others and their personality are all part of the whole package that makes us find someone attractive. If you never get beyond the photo you will never find out how attractive a person really is.

Adjust your settings

Sometimes people start using photos to select profiles they are interested in simply because they get so many matches that they couldn’t possibly read them all. If you get too many matches go back onto your profile and adjust your settings to be more specific, whether that’s through their age range, location or occupation. This is your chance to find someone who is exactly right for you and the more specific you can be about what you want, the better chance there is that the matches you get will all be good prospects.

Reading profiles

The majority of profiles get skimmed over when someone has a spare two minutes in their busy day. If you are really committed to the process of finding a new partner it is important to set some time aside each week to read as many of the matches you have received that week as possible. If possible, print out the profiles of any matches that you have received that week and resolve to read them properly when you have time and are relaxed and comfortable with no other distractions.

Create your profile

Making contact

In traditional dating it might be seen as rude to be getting to know more than one person at a time but in the world of digital dating not only is it acceptable, it is encouraged. The more people you make contact with, the better. From the matches you have read select two or three to make contact with each week even if they don’t seem ‘perfect’ on paper. If they return your contact then move onto meeting face to face as soon as possible. By meeting them in person you will have a more realistic idea of whether you find them physically attractive than and you will be sure that you ore not overlooking someone who could be the perfect match for you.

Dating is like most things in life – the more you put in the more you will get out.

If this article gave you the confidence to find your match, try eharmony today!

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