New year, fresh approach
BEAR with me while I offer up a fishing analogy. The best anglers, the ones who catch the most fish consistently, have several things in common: some knowledge of their quarry, energetic application to the task and a willingness to change tactics if a bait or location isn’t producing the results they are after. It is that third one that is most important. The average angler will put a bait or lure on the line, plonk it in the water and wait for the fish to respond. If nothing happens, they just stick with the same bait, displaying admirable patience but little resourcefulness. Eventually they go home empty-handed and blame the fish. The expert fisherman will try a bait or a lure and if it doesn’t work in a reasonable amount of time, they change it. And they keep changing until they find what works, moving to new locations, employing different colours or retrieve speeds in the case of lures, using live baits instead of frozen stuff – all the while trying to match what the fish are feeding on. You can take a leaf out of their book. If things are a little slow on the dating front, time to change the bait…
The start of a new year is the perfect time to refresh your dating profile. It doesn’t mean your old one was bad, but there’s not a thing on the planet that doesn’t undergo regular renewal so your profile shouldn’t miss out. Here’s a few things to consider:
Change your photos
This is the easiest thing to do, and one of the most effective. If you’ve had the same snaps sitting on your profile for a while, swap them out for new ones. Make sure you look relaxed, happy and friendly. Avoid the themed shots – no doing star jumps in front of the pyramids or posing with your motorbike. You should be the focus, not those other things. Don’t put up a picture where you’ve cropped out most of your ex but you can still see a bit of random shoulder or hair. Tacky. And don’t try to hide your body. Honesty is a very attractive trait, and it will shine through in your photo choices.
Do a humour check
It’s not easy describing yourself in detail for an audience of strangers. Sometimes you can come across as a bit too earnest humourless. Sometimes the opposite is true … you can come across as too frivolous or lacking substance. Read your profile as if you are having an out-of-body experience – what do you look like from the outside looking in? Having a mix of light-hearted and serious paragraphs will provide more intrigue than a monologue that reads like a job application.
Also, have a look at your non-negotiables…
Are you ruling out too many potential soulmates by stating you won’t countenance a date with a right-wing vegan cat lover who thinks the moon landing was fake? They might have other exceptional qualities. As with the photos, don’t be afraid to completely rewrite your profile.
Phone a friend
Get someone who knows you well and has your best interests at heart to look at your profile and invite them to offer constructive criticism. Your friends know who you are and will have a view on what your best attributes are. Ask them to check your profile to see how you present yourself.
Happy New Year, and good luck with the fishing!
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