2024 wishlist: Zero regrets, healthier ‘ships and spicier sex

Welcome to a new dating year. eharmony’s Dating Diaries are back, uncovering all the dating, sex, and relationship trends we’re experiencing now and in the coming 12 months

To kick off the new year, we’ve investigated dating leagues. Plus, we discover Australians plan to be more open about what they need in bed, according to our survey participants’ New Year’s sexolutions. And plenty of daters of all ages are planning to turn over a new leaf to improve their relationships when the clock strikes midnight.

Dating’s new league

The concept of dating leagues isn’t new. How many times have you heard someone say, “They’re punching above their weight”? But in 2024, the measure of the ‘league’ has changed. In the past, it generally only referred to physical characteristics, but younger generations are digging deeper.

More than half (68%) of Gen Z respondents have or are currently dating someone they consider out of their league, compared to 75% of Millennials. Given these figures, it’s perhaps surprisingly that neither age group – Gen Z at 27% and Millennials at 16% – was particularly interested in dating out of their league.

The research also showed how we think about leagues has evolved. Here’s how younger dating generations rate potential partners:

Top Qualities singles look for in a partner:

eharmony relationship psychologist Sharon Draper says: “These new dating leagues show us daters’ current values and how they impact the dating landscape. We already know Gen Z and Millennials are culture shifters when it comes to mental health and quality of life, so it makes sense they’re interested in a partner who has emotional intelligence, humour and intellect.

“Dating in and out of one’s league can affect our self-esteem. When dating someone perceived as out of their league, daters may experience feelings of inadequacy or insecurity. You might feel intimidated by their partner or worry they’ll run off with someone better.

“When people consider themselves in the same league as their partner, the relationship is likely to be more satisfying. There should be a sense of comfort, compatibility and connection. In truth though, getting to a point where you feel that is more about good communication than two people’s perceived leagues.”

New Year, New Moves: Here’s to our Sexolutions

Forget about committing to summer travel or learning a new language. Australians’ 2024 new year’s resolutions are all about spicing up their sex lives.

Of all the Australian singles surveyed, a fifth (20%) want to experiment with different sexual positions. Millennials lead the pack in leaving missionary behind, with almost half (49%) wanting to try something new.

In fact, Millennials seem to know what they want; more than half (56%) of those in a relationship give nonverbal and 45% give verbal feedback during sex, with 34% focused on better communicating their sexual desires to their partner in 2024.

Overall, more than a third of all singles surveyed want to have more sex in 2024, with Gen X leading the charge (39%), followed by Gen Z (36%) and Millennials (30%)

There is one thing we don’t want more of, and that’s knowing how many people our partners have slept with. Only 14% of AU singles say body count matters a lot to them.

Sharon Draper continues: “These results indicate many people have come to realise success in the bedroom has nothing to do with how much experience or how many partners we’ve had. Knowing sexual pleasure is best achieved through open communication about your needs and desires with your partner is so important. Of course, many of us have been taught we shouldn’t openly talk about sex, so it can be difficult to break down those walls to discuss your desires.

“Broach sexual topics at times other than when you’re in bed. When you’re out having a walk is a good time because you’re not face to face. Talk about what you like. Commit to trying something new. Create a sexual bucket list together. The brain is the largest sexual organ, so even having these types of conversations can act as a spark to your sex life.”

Regrets? Not in 2024

Looking back on the past year, 42% of Gen Z singles have 2023 dating regrets. More than a quarter (27%) wish they’d been more proactive with a crush. Both single Millennials (30%) and Gen X (26%) agreed this was also their biggest dating regret from the past year.

Single men were more likely to wish they’d be proactive with a crush (30% compared to 21% of women), while single women were more likely to wish they’d prioritised themselves over dating (22% versus 15% of men).

Of the singles surveyed, 44% said they wanted to enter a long-term relationship this year. This was most important for Millennials (54%) and Gen X (52%).

For those in relationships, 43% of Gen Z and 26% of Millennials want to prioritise their relationships and 32% of Gen Z and 43% of Millennials want to make them healthier. And spicier. Millennials were most likely (35%) to want to explore their sexuality, compared to 18% of Gen Z. Only 15% of those in relationships surveyed indicated they wanted to get engaged or married in 2024.

Sharon Draper adds: “Examining your regrets and setting some relationship goals for 2024 is a healthy way to go into the new year. By looking at where you feel you fell short or examining what is missing in your love life, you can look at the broader actions you need to take to make improvements.

“But it’s not just enough to recognise your flaws or mistakes, you have to identify what attitudes, actions and associations you need to change to help you reach your 2024 relationship goals.”