Too Busy To Date: Why That Doesn’t Have To Be True

We all have seasons in our lives, ranging from very relaxed to too busy to date, to anywhere in between. Being too busy for dating is a common lament among all kinds of people, from grad students to single parents to executives, but is being too busy for a relationship an excuse – or a valid reason? In this article, we’ll look at some of the challenges busy people face when it comes to finding time for love and offer you some tips for finding time in your busy schedule to date, if that’s something you would like to do.

Sometimes you just really are too busy for love

Being too busy to date isn’t restricted to a single gender or demographic. Balancing the different aspects of your life – work, school, parenting, general life administration, and hobbies – can be very challenging, especially if you don’t have help. Additionally, being too busy has been shown to lead to increased dating anxiety and depression, heightened levels of stress, frustration, anger, guilt and even physical illness¹ due to not being able to give all of your commitments the attention they deserve.

While some people genuinely do not have time for a romantic relationship, others use being too busy to date as an excuse to avoid the real problem – perhaps a fear of commitment, or a worry they’re not good enough. It’s worth examining why you’re reluctant to give dating a shot before deciding you are indeed too busy. That being said, if you want to make time for dating alongside your other commitments, it’s absolutely possible. You’re not too busy to date – you just have to figure out how to manage your time so you can carve out space for a significant other in your life. In the next section, we’ll look at ways to date as a busy person.

How to date as a busy person

Even if you think you’re too busy to date, there are ways you can make relationships easier on both yourself, and anyone you’re interested in.

Be honest with your date

You have a lot of other commitments, and there’s nothing wrong with that. However, it’s important to be upfront with anyone you’re seeing that you may not have a lot of time for them. If you don’t, they might think you’re not invested in the relationship or are ignoring them. Being honest right from the start will help you find someone who understands your schedule and won’t think you’re too busy to date them.

Date someone who understands your schedule

Dating someone who understands your schedule is key to successfully finding love as a busy person. Unlike what romance novels or movies will tell you, you don’t need to be with your partner all the time – in fact, some people find that suffocating. Look for someone who gets that the amount of time you can spend with them isn’t an indicator of how strong your feelings are – your odds of success will be higher from the start.

Be productive, not busy

If you feel like you’re too busy to date, take a look at your schedule and see what you’re actually accomplishing in the time you have. There’s a difference between being productive and being busy – the former is how much you actually get done, while the latter may just mean you’re not using your time efficiently. Taking a step back and looking at your schedule can help you see where you can be more efficient, while freeing up time to date.

Ask for help

Consider that you might be too busy to date simply because you insist on doing everything yourself. Delegation is an important and very underrated skill that more of us should practice. It’s okay to ask for help, especially during a busy season of your life. Most people, especially people who love you, will be happy to help make your life easier. Especially if you tie your self-worth to your ability to do things, asking for help can be scary – but you should do so anyway.

Consider online dating

If you’re too busy to date the conventional way, online dating may be a good option for you. A big advantage of online dating over its traditional counterpart is how much less time it takes – you don’t have to get dressed and go places; all the magic happens on your device. Additionally, you can look for love online when you have time, even just a few minutes, making it a great option for busy people who still want to date.

You can always find time for love

Between work, school, hobbies, taking care of our friends and family, and the daily business of living, many of us are often too busy to date – or we’re happy to say we’re  too busy for a relationship as an excuse. An online dating site like eharmony is a great way for busy people like you to find love. Our unique Compatibility Matching System will help you find someone who matches your values and desires in a relationship, and our vast pool of eligible singles makes it easy to find a match, no matter what type of person you are. Sign up for eharmony and stop saying you’re too busy to date today.